the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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