I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
