who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Randomize
