I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
