she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'd cum for enchiladas.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
