Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.

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(951): View more from California

what ever happened to devon sawa?

(415): View more from California

fuck...who knows?

(951): View more from California

i'm really worried about him.

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(815): View more from Illinois

You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!

(847): View more from Illinois

Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!

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(585): View more from New York

you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish

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(301): View more from Maryland

let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."

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(217): View more from Illinois

The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.

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(415): View more from California

Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila

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(607): View more from New York

I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"

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(443): View more from Maryland

When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.

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