i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
