One girl and one boy is just not enough.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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