okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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