More tranny stories later!
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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