How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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