PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Randomize
