I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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