Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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