I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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