Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize