have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
