sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Randomize
