real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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