im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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