i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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