You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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