I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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