Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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