so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I want you more than these girls want KFC
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
