im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
