She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
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