a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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