wrigley field is MILF paradise
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
