I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he told me I talked like a deaf person
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize