We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
