So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
