OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I party with great urgency now.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
