Got a toothbrush?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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