Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
