BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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