We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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