i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
