A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
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