next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize