i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Randomize
