Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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