i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
