Sry I called you an 8
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize