...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
