pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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