There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
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