need another drink. this is the easiest way
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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