two words: eviction party
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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