He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
